


Nobody Wants to Hear you Sing

by Chooboozle, Emono



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Abuse, Daydreaming, Host/Tenant, M/M, Murder, Old-Fashioned, Rimming, Ryan is traumatized from his father, Ryan's Past of ghost AU, Ryan's mom died, Terrible Past, Violence, mental illness?, minor/major character death, this is before he died and what happened to him
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-13
Updated: 2015-11-13
Packaged: 2018-05-01 10:00:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,474
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5201657
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chooboozle/pseuds/Chooboozle, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emono/pseuds/Emono
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ryan Haywood never had a truly happy life. Never knowing love and always knowing the cruelty of his dad, he grew up broken and alone, just wanting his mother in his arms once again. Sadly, she died from the flew when Ryan was just a small boy. He was finally able to get a house, only making money as a host and a landlord that allows people to stay for rent. As an adult, he finally breaks - doing what he secretly does best to his tenants that come in for a stay. </p><p>(Chooboozle and Emono's Ghost AU past)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nobody Wants to Hear you Sing

**Author's Note:**

> **THIS FIC HAS A MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH/MURDER. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED**
> 
> This is Ryan Haywood's past from my and Emono's We Will Meet and Never Part. But instead of [Daniel's](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4212744/chapters/9521631) past hen he was still alive with Kovic, this is Ryan's which takes place before Dan's time. 
> 
>  
> 
> Also, sorry about the delay of posting. Exams, ya know? But good news! All this studying has made me have great grades!

* * *

 

 

He woke up panting, soaked in a cold sweat. He felt cold and he hiked the blankets close to him, regretting sleeping without any article of clothing on. Sleepy eyes traveled towards the wall, looking at the clock that constantly droned with haunting ticks.

 

Half past two in the morning. The sun wasn’t due to rise for another five hours, but the moon was high in the air and lighting up his bedroom. Shadows of the curtains trailed on the walls, looming like ghosts. They swayed even without a wind to startle them. But, in this house, there were more demons lurking in the shadows than ghosts; Haywood knew it upfront. He was terrified to try to sleep again and he rubbed his temples, contemplating grabbing a glass of water from downstairs.

 

“Damn nightmare,” he muttered to no one, but he acted like someone was there just for the illusionary comfort that someone was listening.. “It was about mom again. I swear, she was there. She was there in my arms and it was the two of us. I was so happy to have her and _he_ wasn’t there.” His voice was full of venom, eyes trailing down to the crumped blankets in his lap. “But then…it was ruined.”

 

He didn’t want to speak of what actually happened in his dream, the pain of it churning up fresh. All he could recall was angry violence and blood; it wasn’t like anything he wasn’t use to, but there was that anger in his heart that made him terrified. His father was a terrible man and he still had every intention to spit on his grave the next time he passed it.

 

The floor felt icy beneath his feet. The house didn’t help with keeping the chilly October air out and goosebumps trailed over his skin. The floorboards gave a faint creak with each step and he snagged a robe that was hanging on a hook before he started down the stairs. A hot cup of black coffee actually sounded good, but he knew that water would be best. Perhaps it would prevent the nightmares of his abusive and terrible father that gave him hell throughout his life.

 

 _“You fuck. It’s your fault she’s dead.”_  And that’s about the time that he could get the whip. It was specially made. It was a belt that was frayed at the end; dad took a razor and cut along the belt to make little tendrils along with attaching small piece of sharp objects such as tiny bits of glass from broken liquor bottles, rocks, and was coated in salt for the extra stings of pain whenever the whips would finally break the skin. He ran his hands through greasy, dirty blond hair as he remembered the awful memories and even ran his fingers against his thighs just to feel the texture of the scars that would never go away due to such injuries.

 

 _Don’t think about it_ , he thought as he grabbed a glass cup from the cupboard and ran the tap. _He’s not here anymore_. His brain itched, for lack of a better term. He shotgunned the glass as if it were alcohol, but then got more water to actually quench his thirst. He no longer felt cold, in fact he felt cozy. He tossed his neck to the side, cracking some weary bones and shuffling his shoulders. Sleep didn’t overcome him and he could feel his blood pumping thick through arteries; he was awake, now.

 

“Perhaps tonight will be favorable as far as rest.”

 

 

~*~

 

 

There was a knock on his door – a noise that shattered the loneliness of the house. Ryan adjusted his spectacles before closing the book in his hand with his palm and getting up from the chair. The clock had just struck noon a couple of minutes ago and Ryan had a pretty good idea as to who was knocking on his door. He dusted off the “room for rent” sign as he passed by his window along with straightening up the collar of his jacket and waving some stray locks of golden hair from his eyes.

 

“Howdy!” immediately came a voice when he opened the door. It was cheerful and light, something that Ryan hasn’t heard in a long while. The light that streamed in from the door being opened made the Gent’s eyes twitch and squint from it being so bright. The man that was in the doorway seem to radiate with it as there was a big, toothy grin on his face. He had a small hat on his head and his coat tails flickered against the small gust of wind, making his musk and expensive-smelling cologne fly right into Haywood’s nose. He smelled nice, even if he looked a little unkempt with dust and grime; he was toned, too with arms that swelled against his coat and hips that rounded out worn looking chaps and scuff facial hair. “Are you Mr. Haywood?”

 

Ryan took a second more to scan the man. There was something about him that he favored – perhaps it was his twisted mind going right into the darkness, but he smiled perversely when he caught those hips in his gaze.

 

_Cute._

“Yes, indeed. I am,” Ryan answered, immediately offering his hand. “Might I have the pleasure of knowing you?”

 

“My name is Jeremy Dooley, good sir. I’ve come from afar and have been only catching trains to sleep on,” he took Ryan’s hand and gave it a firm shake, something else that made Haywood’s muscle twitch with excitement. “I saw your sign and also heard about your place and was wondering if you could give me a couple nights of stay. I could use a clean-up and a warm bed to sleep on.” 

 

Something in Haywood’s head clicked and he gave a twisted grin that he hope looked more friendly than sinister. “Of course!” he said cheerfully, immediately offering the doorway to Jeremy. “Right this way, Mr. Dooley. Please, get comfortable. You’re just in luck; all rooms are usually vacant this time of the year and so you can choose whichever one would make you feel the most at home.”

 

“Ah, that sounds good,” the other said as he picked up two brief cases.

 

“Please, let me carry them while you find a room,” Ryan offered as he took the cases. “All of the rooms are vacant except for the one upstairs at the very end of the hall.” His and the new tenant’s eyes met as he gave a pause, a small smirk playing his lips. “That’s _my_ room.”

 

“I would never impose,” Jeremy chuckled, hands in his pockets. “I think this room right here will do.” He walked down the hall just a couple of feet to the first door on the right. “Near the kitchen and the bathroom. Location is all I am picky about, Mr. Haywood.”

 

“Then this is perfect,” Ryan said as he shuffled the cases into one hand and pulled out a key from his pocket. He opened the door, the tumblers in the lock making loud metallic clanks before the door finally gave way opened up to reveal a very homey room. Jeremy gave that welcoming smile as he did before and took back the cases. “This is lovely!” he exclaimed as he walked in. “God, so much better than a freight to lay down on.”

 

“I’m glad it’s to your liking. Get cleaned and do as you wish. Dinner will be ready in a few hours,” Ryan offered. “I hope you like chicken.”

 

“Goodness, anything home cooked sounds like heaven right now,” Jeremy admitted, setting the cases on the bed. “I can’t thank you enough. How much will it be for two nights? I gotta be up to my friend’s before the weekend.”

 

Ryan pondered the amount in his head, but he was more distracted at Jeremy’s stance. It was shifted to the side, jutting out a lush looking hip and nearly made Ryan’s mouth water.

 

 _You pervert. Stop looking and answer him and perhaps you can have some decent time alone_.

 

“Two nights? That’ll be around eight dollars.” He leaned against the door, eyes lidded, still mesmerized. Dooley had milky brown eyes that were soft and kind, seeming to give off a little light of orange. The man began to search his case, pulling out a small hand satchel and counting out a few bills until he found the desired amount.

 

“Eight, you said? Goodness, that’s actually a fair deal compared to some rooms I see here,” he smiled and handed the money to Ryan who pocketed immediately in his jacket.

 

“I try,” Ryan responded with his voice low. “I’ll leave you for now until dinner is ready,” he grinned. “Thank you so much.”

 

 

~*~

 

 

Ryan continued to turn the chicken on the skewer, liking the way it was browning up. A few more minutes of turning over the fire and dinner should be done. He also made some corn and peas on the side and they were in a pot, boiling to perfection. He felt quaint being able to cook for a new tenant and he was hoping that Jeremy would come out soon and maybe engage in some small talk. What was truly going on in his mind, however, would be tonight.

 

He pictured it so vividly to the point that he would have to purposely tell himself to focus that way nothing overcooks. He was getting so excited over the thought of Jeremy that he had to hide his growing hardness by shuffling his pants loosely.

 

 _I can only imagine what he would sound like – what he would feel like._ It had been a while since he got to have a bit of fun with a beau. Normally it would be teenage prostitutes that sounded so frail and fake, trying to milk him of an orgasm instead of letting the fire burn and the fun last a little bit longer. There was a sweet taste that came on his tongue as he pictured the new tenant and his rugged, toned body spread out before him with nice rounded cheeks pushed apart for him to lick at. That thought alone made his cock twitch and fully harden and he cursed himself for ever thinking of these thoughts right before dinner was about to be eaten.

 

“Goodness,” said the familiar voice and Haywood gave a small, silent gasp before turning his head to see Jeremy standing there right beside of the table. He was in a new outfit – just a nightshirt and some relaxing pants. The shirt was tight and conformed to his muscles, showing off every pec and biceps as if he were wearing a second skin. “It smells delicious, Haywood. You mind if I grab a seat?”

 

“Not at all,” Ryan smiled. “Please. If you like, there is some bourbon in the cupboard. Pour yourself a glass.” He turned his attention back on the food, a wide smile crossing his face. He heard the other skidding the chair lightly in order to grab at the bourbon and that only increased Ryan’s excitement even more so. The bottle wasn’t full, but there was good amount and Jeremy was careful when he poured. He finally killed the fire, pulling the skewer with the chicken on it and placing it on a plate that was on the table. He watch Jeremy with careful eyes. His back was turned to him, pouring them both a small glass. Ryan prepped the rest of the table, grabbing a long, large knife before diving into the chest of the bird.

 

“You have a family, Haywood?”

 

The knife slipped, hitting the cutting board much harder than the host intended. He tried not to tick, his fingers gripping the handle until his knuckles turned white; then, they finally eased. “Not anymore. I’ve never had a wife or any tiny children, either.” He turned to face the tenant, hand extending as if to expect his drink to automatically come to him. Jeremy took the hint, passing the glass with the dark liquid Haywood and he gulped it down as if it were nothing.

 

_I’ll need more if this is the subject of the night._

 

“No lucky woman?” Jeremy smiled, downing his glass as well before taking a seat at the table.

 

“Was never interested in them,” Ryan answered, snickering a little at just how sinful it sounded. He dropped his eyes down at the plates in his hands before scooting one towards Jeremy.

 

“Really? I never had a thing for them, either in all honesty. My wife, the bitch, took off with some fucker over near Utah. I swore if I ever saw her again, she was dead.”

 

Ryan laughed in amusement, raising an eyebrow. “I don’t blame you. Except I would have already saved her the trip,” he winked as he finally dove his fork into the peas and ate some. “The only woman I was ever interested in was my mother. She was the only angel I’ve ever loved. She didn’t survive the winter though after my 10th birthday. Damned flu.” He grabbed his fork, but was distracted. His eyes drifted off, staring at the wall and not moving. They were locked on the clock, pupils blown out of proportion as he recalled a faint memory.

 

_“Mama?” Ryan, much, much younger, gave the woman a bowl of chicken broth that he made himself. Father was gone again, nowhere to be scene while his wife sat in the bed shivering. Her skin was pale and thin. Veins were dark and completely visible to Ryan’s eyes and he remembers tracing them with his fingers until he finally got a hold of her hand. He squeezed lightly. “I’m here, mama.”_

_“I’m glad you are.” Her voice was gentle – kind. It was the only soothing voice that he loved. The same voice that sung him to sleep during those rainy, dark nights as the thunder would crack and the wind would howl. Her hands were so cold; they were no longer the same warmth that he recalled when she would rock him to sleep. “You’re my lovely boy.” She coughed and it sounded dreadful to the point that Ryan cringed, immediately grabbing the pale that was right beside of her bed. She gagged, but nothing came up. She didn’t eat anything for days and she was even ignoring the bowl of broth that he gave her._

_“Mama, you gotta’ eat,” he said, his voice just above a whisper. It was broken, threatening to cry. “Here,” he grabbed the spoon and dipped it into the warm liquid before pulling it towards her lips. Nothing. She didn’t open up and she looked at him with tired, sleepy eyes that looked as if she were about to nap any second._

_“Not hungry,” she yawned, sniffling air. “Just…cold. Please, the blankets, dear.”_

_“Yes, ma’am.” He went for the blankets in the next room, making his movements fast and swift. He gathered an arm full and sprinted right back to her only to find the spoon full of broth clattered to the floor, the bowl toppling down along with it. “Mama!” he yelled, dropping the blankets on the bed over her, trying to make her as warm as possible. He’ll clean the mess later, hopefully before Father got home and he beats him for it. “Are you hurt? Are you okay? Sing me a lullaby, mama, I’m scared.”_

_There was nothing._

 

Jeremy frowned. “I hate that. The same happened with my cousin. Loved him like a brother.” Ryan snapped out of it, blinked back into reality and realizing that he was sitting here with his new tenant who already started eating. “Miss him so much. I know you miss your mom too.”

 

Ryan nodded, but didn’t respond. Sympathy was still something that he was just not used to showing. They are in silence for a couple of minutes before the tenant made a steady, low noise of gratitude.

 

“This is possibly the best chicken I’ve ever had, Haywood.” He was already halfway done with his plate and he continued to eat as if he were starved. The host gave a smirk, eyes lidded lightly.

 

“Is it? Have more. I was hoping you would enjoy it and there’s always going to be leftovers. Won’t want any of this to go to waste.” He got up from the table and headed to the cupboard, grabbing the entire bottle of bourbon and no glass to go with it.

 

 

~*~

 

 

They were laughing, practically stumbling drunk as they got up from the chairs, their plates messy and all of the food completely gone; the bottle of bourbon was practically drops, now. Ryan didn’t even remember was he was laughing at, but it just felt good. He waved off the dishes as Jeremy started to head back to his room, continuing to tell the story about how he and this one fellow from down South almost robbed a bank because they lost a wager. Ryan faded in and out of listening, more smiley than anything as Jeremy finally got to his door and leaned on the post.

 

“Jesus Christ, my jacket’s all messed up. I got to wash it,” he started to take off the mucky article of clothing until he whined, realizing that it was hard to do. Ryan chuckled.

 

“Here,” he said, taking a hold of the collar. “Let me help.”

 

“You don’ gotta. I mean you’re too sweet for –”Jeremy laughed when Ryan yanked on his coat, tossing him forward. “A little rough aren’t you?”

 

“Do you like rough?” Ryan’s voice was as low as a bass, eyes locked onto Jeremy’s. Their breaths seemed to be synchronized, tickling each other’s noses as they came closer. “A cute thing like you?”

 

Two blacked out seconds later, they were in each other’s faces, lips locked and teeth threatening to pinch each other’s skin. Jeremy gave a desperate moan through his nose, hands snatching a hold of Ryan’s collar as he deepened the kiss. It was desperate and even childish from how messy the movements were, but they didn’t care and they finally parted for a big breath. Ryan started down at the man, eyes fully shot and tired. He bit his lip as he took a fist and grabbed the front of Jeremy’s shirt, snatching him close until their noses touched.

 

“You wanna play, little kitten? I’ve been eyeing you fucking day.”

 

Jeremy was breathless, lips tracing over Ryan’s again until they met in another kiss. His knee bumped up against the host’s and Ryan leaned back until the frame of the door supported the both of them.

 

“Are you shitting me? I was hopin’ you were after you said somethin’ about not being interested in women,” Jeremy admitted, kissing the jawline on Haywood and earning a purr from the older. Ryan’s hands found their way to the smaller man’s frame, giving a fond squeeze. Jeremy made the most adorable noise he ever heard – nothing that was fake like those prostitutes, but it was _thirsty_.

 

“Get on the fucking bed,” Ryan commanded, Jeremy wasting not a second longer. He was quick to get on the bed, ripping off his jacket finally and trying to undo the belt on his pants. Ryan quickly followed him, knees digging on the bed and meeting Jeremy in another kiss. Hands nearly clawed at each other, Ryan button off all of the buttons of Jeremy’s shirt in one swift pull and exposing a beautiful, tight chest peppered with dark hair. “Pretty kitten,” Ryan breathed heavily. He pressed his nails a little harder than intended as he raked down the man’s chest. The man’s chest was tight running with a fair amount of light hair nearly stood on ends, excited for what was about to become.

 

“Haywood,” Jeremy stated with a slur. His tone was conflicting, seeping with need yet full of what sounded like a slight bit of hesitation, especially when calloused fingers came up and curled themselves around the host’s wrists. Ryan looked at the tenant, eyes wide and pushing; they looked wild and frantic as if Jeremy were looking into the eyes of a starving bear that just got a hold of prey. He spoke nothing more and his breath escaped him in a loud huff. His chest seemed to cave in from the force that pushed so hard that it was if he got toppled by an animal, Ryan immediately coming on top of him to meet in another kiss, chests pressed together and hands trying to find some place to land. Ryan tore away the loose belt and buttons on Jeremy’s chaps and wrapped a hand around the man’s already fattened and hard cock.

 

Tongues slid over each other and Haywood laughed lightly, biting down on the bottom lip of Jeremy to where the man gave an embarrassing, pitchy squeal. “I can’t wait to hear what you sound like on my cock,” Ryan teased, getting up from Jeremy who just laid helplessly on the bed. His body was pliant and completely limp, only his eyes trailing down and watching as Ryan slid down his body. Chilled fingers hooked against his pants, making the skin on creamy hips with darkened hair pepper with goosebumps. Jeremy finally gave a breath of relief when the host was down on the floor, tossing off the remainder of his pants and allowing his cock to spring erect and proud in the air. The younger received a laugh from the man on the floor, going ahead and offering himself by spreading his legs as wide as he possibly could while inebriated as he was. He was afraid to roll of the bed if he were to lift his thighs in the air.

 

“Filthy slut, showing your hole to me as if you just _expect_ me to lick it like a damn dog,” Ryan snarled, grabbing a hold underneath Jeremy’s thighs and lifting them up on the air for him. The tenant gave a whine, almost sounding sorry and embarrassed for ever making Haywood do the work instead of helping him out. He blushed like a little girl attending an academy when Ryan hooked the bends of his knees over his shoulder, spreading the rounds of fat that laid over strong cheeks with a gentle span of his fingers and immediately delve his tongue inward, licking across a sweet, tight rim that flinched for more.

 

“Fuck!” was the only word that was in Jeremy’s vocabulary as his fingers gripped the sheets tightly. He tried to keep himself calm, but he pressed himself against Ryan’s lips. The host didn’t mind; in fact, he loved it, purposely flicking out his tongue to swipe over Jeremy’s hole – each time, getting a physical reaction from the latter. He could feel the tight rim around his tongue fluttering, as if it were actually around his cock instead.

 

 _Young, wild boy hasn’t felt what it’s like to be properly eaten out_. The noises that the younger made was equivalent to music in Haywood’s ears and he heightened the licks bit by bit just to get more desperate pleas. Jeremy tasted of sweet honey, thickening slightly as Jeremy would rock his hips against Ryan’s lips. The host gripped the tenant’s cheeks, giving a harsh _squeeze_ enough that there were dark splotches of purple already forming – a nice marking that satisfied Haywood.

 

Fingers playfully teased at Jeremy’s hardened length, curling slightly around to give a couple of strokes, but would immediately let go much to the tenant’s dismay. “Come on,” he coaxed. “A little bit more and I’m done…” He gasped as Ryan let go, his length twitching with abandoned and dripping with precum. “P-please,” he begged, head tossed back into the mattress to where short, dark locks of hair were scattered on the sheets and clinging to his head by beads of sweat.

 

Ryan hummed, shaking his head and purposely dragging his lips over Jeremy’s rim. He felt it clench, trying to grip onto _something_ that could fill him properly, but the host wouldn’t give it to him. Jeremy cursed, eyes screwing shut as he tried to touch himself, but the hand was smacked away.

 

“H-Haywood,” he warned, his breath leaving him.  Hi teeth felt as if they were going to shatter with how powerful he was gritting them. His hips _trembled_ Ryan heard another wistful moan that made the host’s fingers dig deep into the silky flesh of the tenant. He finally pulled away, giving a small, kind kiss on the inner thigh of Jeremy before sitting back up on his knees.

 

“Turn around,” he commanded with a rough voice, his knuckles cracking as he balled his fingers into a fist. “I wanna see you spread before me.”

 

Jeremy was breathless, finally having a tug at his aching cock before he obeyed. His eyes looked up, but they were weak and lidded, eyes having a layer of haze from both adrenaline and alcohol. Ryan watched with a sadistic smirk as he watched the man move, legs wobbly and weak as he turned around, face facing the sheets and ass close to Ryan’s. The grabbed at the lush cheeks passively, purring silently in his throat as he saw Jeremy bow his back.

 

The man was absolutely _flawless_. His face was lax as it laid it to the side, showing off long lashes that pecked the tops of his cheekbones. His lips were perfectly red and plush, being used from the rough kisses. Ryan snarled, digging his nails deep into the skin just to see Jeremy’s face give the slightest grimaces.

 

Ryan rubbed the head of his cock against the tenant’s hole, groaning at how positively _tight_ he was; his heat trailed deep until Ryan actually shuddered.

 

 _Lovely prey_.

 

 

*

 

 

The sounds of Ryan’s grunts were drowned out from Jeremy’s needy moans. The tenant had his hands locked onto the headboard, head tilted back to expose a round, luscious throat. There were fragments of words, but nothing that Ryan could really distinguish from anything other than just _hungry_ noises. Ryan rocked into him at a steady, rough pace – the only other sound besides their moans was the satisfying slap of skin with each thrust.

 

Jeremy was absolutely hot and _tight_ around Ryan and the host’s eyes flickered when he felt the slick walls flutter around his cock. He felt spoiled with the way Jeremy was moving around him, bouncing back to deepen each thrust. From the way Jeremy gripped his cock, he knew he was close. He wanted to give the man the release he’s been longing for. Dooley had a hand wrapped around his cock, but Ryan was too far gone to realize if the latter had already messed up his sheets or not. He was completely lost in the symphony of moans. To hear those pliant, needy moans that were so feathery against his ears made his body tremble with _greed_.

 

 _Yes, yes, my pretty…_ Ryan bit his tongue, losing himself in a fog as he finally traced his hands closer to the younger man’s throat. There was something that came over Ryan and once again, he felt his brain itch. The feel of _control_ and having Jeremy in such a vulnerable position like this. It _thrilled_ him and he licked his lips as he saw just how relaxed the man was under him – soft and pliant like wanting prey. He always loved his clients like this; it gave him purpose. The tips of his fingers ached and burned; they itched and seemed to be desperate clench around and _squeeze_ and he snatched it, catching Jeremy by the throat.

 

_Scream for me._

 

The younger choked and his muscles tightened like the back of a bow. There was a particle of a word that he wanted to yelp out, but it never came. Everything _clamped_ down and barred down until Ryan felt the overwhelming, wonderful sensation of his cock being clung by wet walls. He buried himself to the hilt, biting his lip until he could taste the sting of blood on his tongue.

 

He squeezed harder.

 

“R-Rya--!” Jeremy took a quick gasp of air, trying to pull away from the host. His nails dragged against the wood of the head board, splintering and damaging the wood and that actually brought a flash of _anger_ through Ryan’s veins. He gave a low growl, not allowing the tenant to escape and he never faltered his grip. He could feel Jeremy trying to resist and he honestly regretted ever having the tenant like this just so he could see his face. He imagined that the younger man’s face would be red, eyes wide with panic and confusion.

 

Jeremy tried to buck away from him, but his strength was weak and nothing compared to Ryan’s hold on him. He gave a small whimper as his breath finally let go and his muscles grew more and more relaxed.

 

 _Odd,_ Ryan thought. _They usually put up one hell of a fight. Not that I don’t mind someone who knows how to submit._ He grinned and sighed happily as satisfaction came over him. The way Jeremy rolled his hips against him nearly made him lose it entirely and he tossed his head back with a low, pleased moan. He long to possess, to _own –_ to have what his father felt whenever he beat the shit out of him and now, he finally felt it.

 

“Don’t take it personally, dear,” Ryan struggled to say past the pleasure. He leaned forward carefully and planted a small kiss on the very arch of Jeremy’s ear. “You were so good. The best I’ve had in a while. Precious thing.”

 

Jeremy finally stopped moving.

 

 

~*~

 

 

The air was nippy as the moon settled into the sky. Ryan didn’t utter a word as he pulled the body, hearing the drag of deadweight behind him. A stray hand hit the counter as they rounded the corner and headed up the stairs, each step making a soft, hallow _thud_ as they rose a level. There was nothing in the air besides those lonely sounds; not a breeze from the cold wind nor a hoot of an owl. The peace and lack of noise made Ryan have a small smile playing his lips as he finally got to the landing. He finally broke the silence and started to hum as he hoisted Jeremy’s body.

 

The man was still completely naked, inner thighs still stained with cream as Ryan finished off when he finally lost consciousness. He was beautiful, and Ryan would be a fool to not admit that. His body was ridged, with only his neck pliant and allowing his head to tilt back as Ryan continued to drag him. Haywood remembered to stash his stuff. He took the rest of Jeremy’s money as well as keep some note and letters from his suitcase to forge a letter to the friend that Jeremy was going to visit to “cancel.” This was a _thrill_ to do this – one of the only two things that made Ryan have peace.

 

There was a wicked smirk that was birthed from that smile and an empty, icy laugh as Ryan opened the door for the attic, seeing how completely dark and void it was. There was a musty, dirty stench that no one would approve of. The smell of very old and faded bones – what _was_ rotting meat of those pretty prostitutes but now have dissipated into a sad, fond memory, recalling just how giggly they were along with their radiant, broken smiles and those hopefully blank hazel eyes.

 

The memory quickly twisted the faces into what was _Jeremy_ , the sweet, handsome man that was behind him now. The host hummed happily as he started up more stairs, grabbing a hidden hammer that was barely shown from soft light.

 

There was a heavy breath that came from the latter and Ryan bit his lip out of nervousness. Was he coming to already? He never actually struck when they were conscious, but there was a fire in his chest that wouldn’t mind a good fight. It would remind him of his days home with Daddy and how he could be throwing fists blindly and uselessly, still remaining black and blue.

 

“Dooley? Jeremy, are you awake?” Ryan stopped his movements up the stairs, looking back to see heavy and closed eyes. There was some purple, blotchy stains that mixed in with fur on his chin and even some purple spots on his cheeks. His hands were dangling aimlessly over his head, allowing gravity from the angle of the stairs to take control. Ryan gave what sounded like a sigh of relief as he finally headed up the last bit of steps and finally made it into the attic.

 

There was dust all around so much so that Ryan coughed, tossing his head inside of his elbow and trying to protect his mouth and nose from the particles. They soon settled down and he slid Jeremy to the final resting place, giving the hammer a playful toss in the air before he caught it again. The handle gave a nice _smack_ in his palm. He turned to give the motionless Jeremy a look, suddenly recalling a common, clear memory that he replayed over and over in his head.

 

_Ryan, just under the age of 19, came into the common room, tip toeing silently with his eyes watching like a hawk for his father. He saw him. His dad was passed out drunk in a chair with a bottle carelessly rolled against his foot – the aftermath of him dropping it from falling asleep._

_Ryan had that lovely idea to sneak out again and maybe hook up with a couple of friends, but before he could even make a move, something clicked._

“It was the perfect time,” Ryan said to himself, giving another playful toss of the hammer. “Why didn’t I think of it earlier and saved myself many years of torture that he gave me, especially after she died?” He continued to talk just as if Jeremy was still conscious and he gave a laugh of twisted contentment. “This was the same hammer.”

 

_Ryan dug through the tool box, his heart racing a mile a minute. He passed through a wrench, a screwdriver, and even a small saw which he knew could be used for later to tie some loose ends. He finally got the hammer, purring silently of how it felt so solid in his hands. He drug it out, making some other tools clatter to the floor like rattling bells. He wasted no time, lip bit down and red in his eyes. Against his tongue was a terrible taste of justice and there was nothing more that he could ever wish for. His veins felt thick with adrenaline as he came closer to his father, his hand drawn back and ready to give the deadly blow._

The sound was satisfyingly sickening. Ryan raised up his arm again and brought it down only to have a little spray of warm blood spatter against his hand.

 

He saw his father dying over and over again and he couldn’t get enough of it. For a split second, he forgot all about Jeremy Dooley and unleashed his wrath on what was his father. His other hand gripped the body’s shoulder tightly for leverage as he continued to pound the hammer against Jeremy’s skull. His face was heated with anger, taking it out on the poor, innocent man, but it was soon letting up as his arm got tired. He stopped, panting and looked down at the murdered man as if he were staring at a mural on a wall painted by a famous artist. He couldn’t stop looking, soaking in everything that he just did to Jeremy Dooley tonight and he could only hope that now, the nightmares would stop.

 

 

~*~

 

 

Ryan had no sleep. There were deep, dark circles that traced under his eyes, giving him a ghosty and deathly gloom as he tried to get ready for the day. The only thing that was on his mind was that he needed to properly dispose of the body and write that letter for Dooley’s friend in order for everything to be tied up.

 

He was hoping that he could actually have some peaceful rest last night, but he should have known better than to hope for that. He was afraid that there would never be another decent night’s sleep as long as he’s still haunted by the demons that belong to him and his past.

 

He headed down the stairs, preparing to look into the toolbox to get the saw and a couple of big garbage bags to aid with hiding Jeremy’s body until he was interrupted by three loud, harsh knocks. He got so started by the sudden noise that he nearly jumped out of his skin, biting his tongue in the process of doing so.

 

“Hello?” asked a muffled voice on the other side of the door. Ryan didn’t answer, eyes wide with curiosity as to who was at his door this early in the morning. “I saw your sign! Are you renting out a room? I need a place to stay for the night!”

 

Ryan’s hands were jittery as he heard the sentence ringing in his ears. A new client already? He honestly couldn’t believe how close that was considering the events that took place the night before. Finally snapping back into reality, Haywood quickly went to the door and opened it, greeting the newcomer with a welcoming smile.

 

This man looked older than Jeremy. He was bigger with just the slightest bit of chub, but his arms were nice and lean. He had a round, adorable face with a healthy smile that lit a room. The man had very curly hair under his hat which he removed in order to properly greet Ryan. “Hello,” Ryan said with lidded eyes. Their luster was gone from the lack of sleep, but Ryan tried to hide it. “Welcome! Please, of course there is a room for you to rent. Are you wanting to stay tonight?”

 

The man nodded and grabbed his suitcase. He only came with one; he must be on a short trip.

 

“If you don’t mind, I would love that. I didn’t realize how far away I was from home and decided to take a load off after a day or two of traveling.” He offered his hand with a grin now plastered on his face. “Nice to be doing business with you! Mr…?”

 

Ryan snatched the hand and shook it eagerly. “Haywood. But, I beg you to call me Ryan.”

 

“Ryan Haywood it is,” the man said and stepped inside. “The name is Michael Burns, but everyone just calls me Burnie. I prefer it that way.”

 

“Mr. Burns,” Ryan hummed. “What a strong name.”


End file.
